Discombobulated

All day I've been out of sorts.

They fixed my car window, but forgot to turn off the dome light while they were working, so I was left with a dead battery. The smell of the cleaner they used reminds me of the rental car we got after someone had vomited in it and then they quickly 'cleaned' it and buried the smell under 'air freshener.'

Earlier, I was on my cell phone as the house phone was ringing and the FedEx guy was trying to deliver a package, not the one for which I'd left the note on the door two days ago. The guy who delivered today walked away saying that our other package would be delivered by someone else later today. Really? No package.

I kept reaching for my backpack when I went anywhere. The backpack Mike gave me to use didn't have any of my usual stuff in it.

I got gifts for the cats' and dog's stockings and while i wasn't looking, one of the cats tore open the bag and took some toys out and chewed them. They also chewed up the wheat grass.

My sister broke the rules they had made and sent me a present. I'd been trying to figure out how to break those same rules, but I hadn't sent anything to my sister yet. My mother sent me a check for about the same amount I spent on her flowers. It all feels awful. I just wanted my mother to have flowers in the winter and a nice picture of Nick. I wanted to send my sister something, anything, but the only thing I could think of were those donations of bunnies and chicks for a family in Africa. I like those things, but it was too late to get the word out to my sister by Christmas.

One of my dog-walking buddies wanted to walk at 8 am in the morning. I just wanted to sleep in a little and spend the rest of the day with my family. I felt like a bum saying no. I realize I need to put something together for her and her husband for Christmas.

I'm not sure this Christmas season will recover in time for me. I'm working hard to get it there. I'm supposed to sing 'Oh Holy Night' on Christmas eve at my little church. I don't know if I can really feel it this year. I don't like faking that kind of thing. I've got a lot of work to do to pull it all together in just two days.

I'm still stunned by the theft of my stuff. Evil takes so much energy to manage.

Thank you for listening, jb