Because a tired dog is a good dog, I took Teddy for a long walk today with a good friend and her dog. We had so much fun, we lost track of time and I missed an appointment at school. Now my feet hurt. I actually have a blister from walking five miles. That is so pathetic!
Now, I'm waiting for Nick to finish karate at Z-Ultimate. I'm at a nearby Tully's, having earned my tea latte. Why not? It is sugar free after all. I also had a piece of their spinach quiche. I like a heartier filling than they use. Theirs is almost the texture of a light custard, yet I love the way they pepper the crust before they add the egg filling. Oh, I like it here. They don't always know my name, but they know my drink and that I like to chat. I was honored when my favorite barista, whom I'd talked to about my writing, introduced me to his boyfriend. I wish that kind of thing didn't have to be kept quiet, that it was just as normal for a man to introduce me to his boyfriend as to a girlfriend. Well, we can be the change we want to see, right? So I didn't blink, nodded my head, and smiled. It was good. Some aspects of life really have changed since I was young.
Guess what?
No, really! Can you guess?
I had an ordinary day today! Nothing blew up or crapped out. Nothing was stolen or damaged. No one was hurt. Am I taking chances by writing this before Nick and I have made it home from his karate class?
I hate to admit that I'm superstitious. I am. I love science. I really do, but I also believe in that chaos theory as presented in the first 'Jurassic Park' movie. Do you remember when Jeff Goldblum's character talks about how a single flap of a butterfly's wings on one side of the world could be the ultimate cause of a hurricane on the other side? Yeah, that? Isn't that mysterious enough as to be practically superstitious?
I'm home now and thankfully, Nick didn't break an arm or anything at karate. I didn't plow into the back end of any other cars on the road. We seem to be safe inside our little home. A grand illusion, that safety of being at home, isn't it?
Okay, so I googled chaos theory and I still don't quite understand it. Weather is a great example of something that is labeled chaotic. It means that, even though weather effects are 'deterministic, initial conditions and overlapping application of these predictable changes' causes weather to be chaotic. What the heck is an initial condition when it comes to weather? I wonder if fractals fit into chaos theory? Fractals are so pretty, but I could see how they'd act similar to weather in that no two results would be alike. I am so over my head here, but it's just one more thing in this world for me to learn more about.
So what I mean about the chaos theory being connected to superstition is that if enough similar random events lead my little brain in the same direction, it leads to a natural sense of superstition. Here's an example: Mike and I both became superstitious that if we put away Nick's nebulizer, then he'd get sick again. (The nebulizer is the machine that allows Nick to inhale his breathing medication more thoroughly.) It happened for both of us somehow, at about the same time, yet quite independently. For years, it was true, except during the summer, that Nick would probably get sick not long after he got well. After a while, I discovered that it wasn't just me that felt better leaving the nebulizer out. Mike did too. Nick's immune system was so fragile that even though we left that ugly thing plugged in next to the couch, he'd still get sick again before too long. How many times, though, did one event have to follow another, that we put away the nebulizer, then Nick got sick again, before our brains interpreted it as cause and effect? Not that many, I'd guess. So have I made a point about the chaos theory being related to superstition? Probably not. It was just a thought anyway.
I'm going to have to think about what I'm superstitious about. Walking under ladders? No. I walk under our ladder whenever I use the grill. Mike, in his particular wisdom, doesn't think it's worth putting away since we're up on the roof two or three times a year anyway. Is that a superstition of his? I don't know. I'm also one of those people who think that if I forget my Goretex jacket, it's more likely to rain. You can't hold off the rain in these parts in any case.
I believe that if I'm not watching, bad things are more likely to happen, like when the dog casually hangs out in the kitchen, I turn my head for one minute, and look over to see that all the cat food is gone. That dog is so hungry. He's not quite forty pounds, but according to Hill's feeding charts, he eats as though he's sixty. He's just now filling out so that I can't see his ribs, so I don't mind so much. Maybe watching so bad things don't happen is some kind of corollary to the watched pot never boiling. I can say, without a doubt, I have watched a pot long enough to see it boil, many times. It's boring, though a little steam is good for your skin if you lean in a bit.
I knock on wood, using my head if none other is available. What the heck does that mean anyway? Wow! I just looked it up. Isn't it cool when you find that one thing you believe connects with something else you thought was unrelated. 'The Phrase Finder' site says that 'knock on wood' may go back to touching wood or a tree in the belief that kind spirits reside within. There may also be a connection to the cross. I just love believing that the trees in my yard are benevolent spirits. I imagine them to be grandmothers and grandfathers, letting us stand on their roots the way babies stand in laps. So I will feel less ridiculous the next time I say 'knock on wood.' I could have been a Druid in a previous life. (Uh oh, now I've brought up the topic of reincarnation. That's a whole different set of beliefs, now, isn't it? A topic for another day, though.)
I'm not sure if it's superstition or just plain fear (remember fear?) that I want the last words I say to Nick and Mike to be 'I love you!' whenever I leave to run an errand or they head off to sleep. I wish I'd heard those words from my dad before he died even if they weren't exactly the last words he said to me. Unfortunately, I have no idea what his last words were, though I remember him talking about the velour blanket being the only thing that didn't hurt as it laid over his legs. So I try to give the 'I love you' phrase to Nick and Mike in case something happens. I also don't like going to sleep mad at either of them. I'll even keep Nick up too late on a school night to work out our differences. That might not be superstition. It might just be about sleeping more soundly in peace than in aggitation.
So now I'm going to go soak my feet in Epsom salts, knock on wood, throw my Goretex into my backpack, and yell 'I love you!' to my guys as we all head off to bed. Good night!
Thank you for listening, jb
Now, I'm waiting for Nick to finish karate at Z-Ultimate. I'm at a nearby Tully's, having earned my tea latte. Why not? It is sugar free after all. I also had a piece of their spinach quiche. I like a heartier filling than they use. Theirs is almost the texture of a light custard, yet I love the way they pepper the crust before they add the egg filling. Oh, I like it here. They don't always know my name, but they know my drink and that I like to chat. I was honored when my favorite barista, whom I'd talked to about my writing, introduced me to his boyfriend. I wish that kind of thing didn't have to be kept quiet, that it was just as normal for a man to introduce me to his boyfriend as to a girlfriend. Well, we can be the change we want to see, right? So I didn't blink, nodded my head, and smiled. It was good. Some aspects of life really have changed since I was young.
Guess what?
No, really! Can you guess?
I had an ordinary day today! Nothing blew up or crapped out. Nothing was stolen or damaged. No one was hurt. Am I taking chances by writing this before Nick and I have made it home from his karate class?
I hate to admit that I'm superstitious. I am. I love science. I really do, but I also believe in that chaos theory as presented in the first 'Jurassic Park' movie. Do you remember when Jeff Goldblum's character talks about how a single flap of a butterfly's wings on one side of the world could be the ultimate cause of a hurricane on the other side? Yeah, that? Isn't that mysterious enough as to be practically superstitious?
I'm home now and thankfully, Nick didn't break an arm or anything at karate. I didn't plow into the back end of any other cars on the road. We seem to be safe inside our little home. A grand illusion, that safety of being at home, isn't it?
Okay, so I googled chaos theory and I still don't quite understand it. Weather is a great example of something that is labeled chaotic. It means that, even though weather effects are 'deterministic, initial conditions and overlapping application of these predictable changes' causes weather to be chaotic. What the heck is an initial condition when it comes to weather? I wonder if fractals fit into chaos theory? Fractals are so pretty, but I could see how they'd act similar to weather in that no two results would be alike. I am so over my head here, but it's just one more thing in this world for me to learn more about.
So what I mean about the chaos theory being connected to superstition is that if enough similar random events lead my little brain in the same direction, it leads to a natural sense of superstition. Here's an example: Mike and I both became superstitious that if we put away Nick's nebulizer, then he'd get sick again. (The nebulizer is the machine that allows Nick to inhale his breathing medication more thoroughly.) It happened for both of us somehow, at about the same time, yet quite independently. For years, it was true, except during the summer, that Nick would probably get sick not long after he got well. After a while, I discovered that it wasn't just me that felt better leaving the nebulizer out. Mike did too. Nick's immune system was so fragile that even though we left that ugly thing plugged in next to the couch, he'd still get sick again before too long. How many times, though, did one event have to follow another, that we put away the nebulizer, then Nick got sick again, before our brains interpreted it as cause and effect? Not that many, I'd guess. So have I made a point about the chaos theory being related to superstition? Probably not. It was just a thought anyway.
I'm going to have to think about what I'm superstitious about. Walking under ladders? No. I walk under our ladder whenever I use the grill. Mike, in his particular wisdom, doesn't think it's worth putting away since we're up on the roof two or three times a year anyway. Is that a superstition of his? I don't know. I'm also one of those people who think that if I forget my Goretex jacket, it's more likely to rain. You can't hold off the rain in these parts in any case.
I believe that if I'm not watching, bad things are more likely to happen, like when the dog casually hangs out in the kitchen, I turn my head for one minute, and look over to see that all the cat food is gone. That dog is so hungry. He's not quite forty pounds, but according to Hill's feeding charts, he eats as though he's sixty. He's just now filling out so that I can't see his ribs, so I don't mind so much. Maybe watching so bad things don't happen is some kind of corollary to the watched pot never boiling. I can say, without a doubt, I have watched a pot long enough to see it boil, many times. It's boring, though a little steam is good for your skin if you lean in a bit.
I knock on wood, using my head if none other is available. What the heck does that mean anyway? Wow! I just looked it up. Isn't it cool when you find that one thing you believe connects with something else you thought was unrelated. 'The Phrase Finder' site says that 'knock on wood' may go back to touching wood or a tree in the belief that kind spirits reside within. There may also be a connection to the cross. I just love believing that the trees in my yard are benevolent spirits. I imagine them to be grandmothers and grandfathers, letting us stand on their roots the way babies stand in laps. So I will feel less ridiculous the next time I say 'knock on wood.' I could have been a Druid in a previous life. (Uh oh, now I've brought up the topic of reincarnation. That's a whole different set of beliefs, now, isn't it? A topic for another day, though.)
I'm not sure if it's superstition or just plain fear (remember fear?) that I want the last words I say to Nick and Mike to be 'I love you!' whenever I leave to run an errand or they head off to sleep. I wish I'd heard those words from my dad before he died even if they weren't exactly the last words he said to me. Unfortunately, I have no idea what his last words were, though I remember him talking about the velour blanket being the only thing that didn't hurt as it laid over his legs. So I try to give the 'I love you' phrase to Nick and Mike in case something happens. I also don't like going to sleep mad at either of them. I'll even keep Nick up too late on a school night to work out our differences. That might not be superstition. It might just be about sleeping more soundly in peace than in aggitation.
So now I'm going to go soak my feet in Epsom salts, knock on wood, throw my Goretex into my backpack, and yell 'I love you!' to my guys as we all head off to bed. Good night!
Thank you for listening, jb
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